The Pay-off

When I was pregnant with Marley, I vowed that as soon as she was born I would start trying to lose weight. I was really healthy in high school and had slowly gained weight since graduating and not being on swim team anymore. But one thing led to another and it took over a year for me to get motivated to get healthy again after having Marley. I assumed I could eat anything while I was breastfeeding and still lose weight. That's what everyone else seems to do. So, I ignored it and convinced myself that it didn't matter. Who has the right to put a time limit on the "just had a baby" excuse anyway? 15 months after giving birth I had gained 20 additional pounds, putting me 46 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight.
It wasn't until Asa went to training in November that I really got serious. I guess I just really took a look at myself and decided I needed to be healthy. It's also hard to diet and exercise when you're living with someone who can eat whatever the heck he wants and still look healthy. So, once he left I ate right and exercised as regularly as I could. I bought DVDs to do at home while Marley was napping. I felt like a weirdo doing workout DVDs with people in the other room, but it was working. I hadn't owned a scale in years, but I decided I needed one if I wanted to be accountable. And when the weather was nice I walked outside with Marley in the stroller. She got used to our walks, and played happily most of the time I was doing a workout DVD. She even got to the point that when she saw me putting my tennis shoes on, she would start laughing and walking in place like I did while working out. She was my biggest motivator.

It was fun to surprise Asa at graduation, 20 pounds lighter than I had been when he left. I took a few weeks off while we were moving and didn't have a kitchen to cook in. But I got back on track once we had our stuff here, and have so far not let the summer heat stop me from working out. I wish I had kept some sort of diary of my feelings through the process, because I had so many ups and downs that I would have liked to share with other people going through the same thing. But, those who know me should know that I am not the kind of person to brag about how I look or something I do. So, I felt nervous about sharing it. But, you know what? I am so proud of what I have accomplished, even if it's almost 2 years after Marley's birth, and I feel like I should be able to brag a little! "Better late than never" definitely fits in this situation. So, here I am this morning, back at my pre-pregnancy weight, 46 pounds down from last summer!
I got really excited when I stepped on the scale Friday morning and pulled out two boxes of my clothes from before I was pregnant. Unfortunately, what they say about your clothes not fitting the same is true. Things are a little different. But that's okay with me, I feel better than I have in years! I plan to keep losing weight, because this is not my ideal weight. But for now I feel awesome! I am proud to say that the old fashioned diet and exercise thing really works. It was hard work, but the pay-off is apparent every day. I feel so more better about myself, I don't have to use Marley as a prop or keep my arms crossed to cover my stomach, and I don't have to hide in the house any more. I wish I had not waited so long, but I am proud to have gotten here again.